Being present might sound cliché, but as Jeffrey Saad reminds us, the simplest truths are often the most transformative. Drawing on the timeless wisdom of Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now, this reflection explores how presence frees us from anxiety, sharpens focus, and deepens connection—with ourselves and others. By living fully in the moment instead of being trapped by past regrets or future worries, we reclaim energy, clarity, and peace. From handling daily stress to improving relationships and work, this episode reveals how mastering presence can quite literally give you more time and a calmer mind.
—
Watch the episode here
Listen to the podcast here
How Being Present Will Save You Time And Take Away Anxiety
The Power Of Presence: Why It’s Not A Cliché
There is no better way to get into the circle and stay in this circle than to be present. I know you’re like, “It’s so cliché.” What’s amazing is that the most cliché things are usually the things we should be doing, but we’re always looking for a new and usually more complicated solution because it just feels like it makes us smarter if it’s more complicated. The simplest thing, if you had one choice and only one choice of what to read, listen to or consume, I would say delete me. Delete everything else and only listen to and read The Power of Now and A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle.
The Power of Now came out in 1997. I read it for the first time in 2007 and I was like, “How has this been around for ten years and I’m just now having the pleasure?” Probably because, like everybody else, I only found out about it because of Oprah or something. It is the most powerful book ever written. I think the challenging part of the book is that, at least for my little brain, it’s very hard to read. You’ve got to be willing to read a page at a time, very slowly, pause, take it in, think about it, reread it.
I’d love to know how many of you agree if you’ve tried to read it and it hasn’t resonated because most people I’ve spoken to, and this is why I wanted to do a Power of Now recap because most people I’ve spoken to are like, “Yeah, it was just too difficult to digest, too difficult to read. I think Eckhart Tolle is literally some kind of angel prophet for real.
It’s just like nothing that’s ever been written or done. I think all of us, including myself, have just worked hard to find another way to say what he’s already said. Another version. What is it? For those of you who haven’t heard it, and for those of you who have, I’m hoping you go, “Now I see it in a better light, a different light, a more clear light.”
Living In The Now: Escaping The Past And Future Traps
Basically, it’s the simple concept of living in this very moment. The future doesn’t exist. I know that sounds weird. The past doesn’t exist. Sounds weird as well because you’ve been there and done that. The reality is that nothing ever happens, not in the present moment, everything. The only thing there is, is this moment. That’s what’s fascinating. When you think about it, even the future, when it comes, if that’s what we’re talking about, you’re still experiencing it as the present moment.
As silly as that sounds, and why it’s so valuable is because every time you think about the future or you tie your happiness, well-being, anything to when this happens in the future, you’re borrowing from the present to put your energy in the future. When you go backwards, you’re borrowing from the present to go backwards and look in the past and then your present account is overdrawn. You’re absolutely not present because you’re living in the past and in the future. We’re all guilty of it to a degree. As I always say, this is never going to be a show about, “I’m perfect and this is the way to live.” No, it’s like I am determined to be a little bit better every day. When I die, whenever that is, I still won’t have arrived, but I’ll be a heck of a lot better than when I started.
That is my goal and I’m finding it really beautiful because I am more present all the time. When you’re present, it’s like ethereal. It’s like needing glasses your whole life and you didn’t know it and then, all of a sudden, you get glasses that are the right prescription and you’re like, “I can see. Everything makes sense now. Everything is clear.” That is what presence is.
Anxiety’s Antidote: How Presence Dissolves Worry
It’s also a huge relief because it is an impossibility to have anxiety or depression or to be sad if you’re in the present moment because rarely does the present moment contain any of that anxiety, depression. Especially anxiety, I believe, comes from, as Eckhart Tolle says, being here, but wanting to be there wherever there is. The more you do that, the more anxious you’ll become.
It is impossible to experience anxiety, depression, or sadness when you are in the present moment, for these emotions rarely exist there. Share on XIt falls right into the circle of control and the storytelling I always talk about because if you’re not in the present, you’re basically storytelling. It’s great to look backwards and glance and go, “What a great time we had in Mexico. I’ll never forget being with my wife, walking down Chestnut Street in San Francisco.” Those are beautiful things. It’s a moment where you just honor something that’s happened and how you’ve gotten here. Beautiful.
The future. “I can’t wait to go to Mexico. We’re going to Mexico City this weekend. That’s fun. Half a vacation. Is looking forward to it.” I’m not saying, and I don’t think Eckhart is either, you shouldn’t ever acknowledge what he calls clock time. Clock time is how we all have to live. The world operates on time. Of course, you have to schedule your haircut for tomorrow at 2:00. Yes, you have to have that deliverable to the client or to your boss, whatever it may be, in 30 days. That should just be a moment where you look ahead, you mark it in your calendar and then you’re done.
That’s very different than, “Everything will be okay once she gets back,” or, “I know everything will be okay once I achieve this goal or make this money or get this car.” Once you start doing that, you’re not in the present anymore. Here’s the catch, here’s the most important part of it. When you’re not in the present moment, people know it. They might not say it that way, but they feel it.
When you're not in the present moment, people know it. They might not say it that way, but they feel it. Share on XOne of my favorite stories is about a buddy of mine who was with his four-year-old daughter. They were sitting on the couch. He had come home to be with her from work and they were sitting there and looking at a book or playing or whatever they were doing. All of a sudden, she leans over really close to her dad, my friend, turns her head to the left, to the right, looks in his eyes and says, “Daddy, are you in there?”
To me, that sums it all up. He was mortified because he wasn’t there. He was in his head thinking about what he has to do tomorrow, literally, while his daughter was right in front of him, thinking that he was interacting with her. We all have done or do a version of that. You are here, but you’re not and people feel that. What happens then? A, they feel disrespected, but they’re not going to tell you because it’s not a blatant, obvious thing like, “I can’t believe you just said that,” but it’s a very powerful subliminal thing.
You’re not with me. It’s very insulting. It even happens with Nadia and I sometimes, like she’ll be sitting right there and I’ll be talking and, all of a sudden, I’m realizing she hasn’t heard half of what I said, probably because I talk too much. Also, because, for whatever reason, she was somewhere else at the moment and it creates tension. We’ve learned to talk about it and have very constructive methods.
She’ll say, “Leave me alone. I need my time.” I’ll say, “You’re so right, I forgot,” and we laugh and then that’s it. If it’s a client, a potential client, as a realtor, I always say the client feels it when you’re not present and it’s rude. You’re waiting for your turn to talk to pitch them on the house, get the listing or convince them on why this should be this and the house is okay, instead of being fully present, looking in their eyes, not as a technique and nodding, but actually really being there.
You don’t even have to say a word and you get a different result because they feel it. It’s incredible. Same thing, if you’re going to date somebody, if you’re going out for a coffee, whatever it is, when you’re fully present, it is the most honorable thing you can do for the person in front of you. It feels so good. I always say one of the reasons I love to travel because when you travel, at least me, I’m forced into absolute present.
I’ll never forget, you’re all going to think I’m a little wuss, the ones that didn’t already think that, I was in this piazza in Italy and I literally had a tear in my eye because there was a moment where I was looking at the cobblestone street and really feeling thousands of years of wear on these stones and these beautiful buildings and looking at the people around me.
I was just so present that I was almost ready to cry. It was emotional because it was like, I’m here and I’m feeling it. The scariest thing to me is that any of us, and unfortunately, I think many of us, could go through our whole life waiting to live and realizing that you’ve missed the whole thing because you were never there. You were never present.
Breaking Free From Ego: Conscious Living Vs. Unconscious Habits
It might sound like an exaggeration and maybe it is to a point, depending on the person and the situation, but I think it’s very real. What Eckhart Tolle talks about is being conscious or unconscious. Most of us go around being unconscious. When you’re conscious, you’re present. When you’re unconscious, you’re serving the ego. The ego wants you to be right. It wants you not to be in the moment. It wants you to be focused on getting stuff.
He calls the ego. Basically, the ego is anytime you identify with form. I am a realtor. No, I’m not. I’m a human being. I do real estate. I am a guy who drives a Ferrari. I am the fun guy at the party. The second you’re labeling yourself and you’re making your being directly related to your things or your career, your ego is in charge and you’re not fully present. That’s what’s incredible. You can catch yourself.
There are different ways to catch yourself and that’s what he says. The first step is just to realize when you’re not present because the second you do that, you’re present in that moment. When I stop and you go, “Look at the beautiful flower,” you’re describing it, you’re looking at it, but that, funny enough, is not being present because you’re turning everything into a label and a thought.
When I’m just sitting there in the mornings after my meditation, or of course, during my meditation and just staring out the window and feeling the presence of the cloud formations in the sky and whatever might be going on, listening to the sounds between the sounds, actually, all of a sudden, it’s like somebody turns up the volume and you’re hearing each individual bird chirp. You’re hearing the rustling of the leaves of a squirrel or whatever it might be. All of a sudden, it’s like Hi-Fi surround sound but it’s just because you’re present. Ways that you can figure out and catch yourself as soon as you start saying when or as soon as, or pointing to the past or future, you’re not present.
Being in victim mode. Sorry, I think people hate me sometimes when I say that, but I’m so passionate about it. I think a lot of things happen in the world, but until we take accountability for everything, I even take accountability for the weather. I don’t care. No matter what it is, I’m not going to blame anything else for my life situation because then, it’s much harder to fix it.
When you own everything and you don’t have the energy to blame because you own it, all of a sudden, you’re just in solution mode and you become more present. When you’re in victim mode, when you’re trying to be right, when you’re acknowledging the future of the past as a contingency of your well-being, these are all things that tell you you’re not being present. That’s when you can catch yourself and start working on it.
One of the things Eckhart Tolle talks about, which I think really worked for me in the beginning, and now I don’t need it as much, but just focus on your breathing. It is almost impossible not to be present when you focus on the breath going in and out of your body. I start with my toes, actually, and I pretend that the energy is coming up through my toes, through my legs, through my torso, and out the top of my head, cleansing me. It’s like it comes in as white, clean air, if you will. It purges out as gray air out of the top of my head. When you focus on that, even if you’re in line feeling a little agitated, why? That’s because you’re here in line and you want to be there at the front of the line, you’re not accepting reality.
It is almost impossible not to be present when you focus on the breath. Share on XEmbracing “Amor Fati”: The Love Of Fate And Acceptance
You’re fighting it. That is not being present. I think one of the greatest examples is being in traffic, being in line. You’re just aggravated, even if it’s very mild because you’re here and you want to be there. That is one of the greatest ways to become present, to just accept the moment as your reality. I have one of the tattoos, amor fati, on my wrist and it means the love of fate. The translation, for me, and as I understand it, is accepting everything as it is and actually being grateful for it, which sounds crazy.
Even if something bad happens, you get a flat tire or worse, you get hurt, there’s a reason for it. It’s all part of the bigger picture. If you fight it, “Woe is me. Now I’m late. Now I miss my appointment. Now I can’t walk because I’m at a cast,” but there’s always something that’s going to come out of that. It’s like that old fable. There are many versions of it, but like there’s this rancher and a horse wanders onto their property, this beautiful horse, and they can’t figure out who owns it.
The neighbor’s like, “You’re so lucky to inherit that beautiful stallion.” The guy’s like, “Maybe.” His son is riding it and falls and breaks his arm because it bucks him off. The neighbors are like, “That horse. It’s such a shame you have that horse. Now your son is in the hospital.” He’s like, “Maybe.” His son isn’t drafted for the Army because he’s got a broken arm and the neighbor’s like, “You’re so lucky that he had that broken arm.” “Maybe.”
You get the idea, but this too shall pass, good and bad. To ever fight what’s actually happening, i.e., the present moment, is just a complete waste of time and energy. It only drains you and affects your ability to bring joy in the moment. That’s the thing I’m most proud of. I truly love my life. I truly feel joyful almost always. All these things are what’s helped me do that because I just accept everything as it is. When my wife and I were new in real estate and you lose a deal, it’s like you talk about it. “I can’t believe this happened and that person did this and we worked so hard.”
That was many years ago. I’m so proud of Nadia, especially because I’ve been on this journey more intensely but she’s amazing because now in the last five years, something falls out, doesn’t happen, she doesn’t even miss skip a beat because guess what? We accept it as what was meant to be. If you can’t change it, circle of control, let it go.
The great thing about being present is it saves you time. Share on XI’m in this very peaceful place that the business I don’t get wasn’t mine to begin with. It wasn’t meant to be. Just because I went on an appointment doesn’t mean it’s mine or should be mine. What I get is what’s mine and what I don’t get is okay, it’s meant for somebody else. When you stop judging every moment, I call it being an injustice collector. When you’re going around, “I can’t believe that person did that. I can’t believe they’re wearing that. I can’t believe they’re driving like that. I can’t believe my boss. I can’t believe my coworker. I can’t believe my wife,” it’s exhausting.
Try to make it through a day without judging one thing. It’s really hard to do. Just to look at another human being and take them in with no judgment. Try it next time you’re at the grocery store or wherever, just look them up and down, head to toe, take them in and don’t have a thought about them or judge in any way, shape or form or even go this far, now you can think I’m even more weird and say, “I love you,” in your head. I’ll do that sometimes to strangers. I love you. It immediately dissipates anything that you may have felt otherwise about. It’s a great concept.
Another little trick I do is, I can’t remember where I read it or heard it, is take a huge deep breath in and then as you exhale, smile, and it sounds so ridiculous, it’s the funniest thing, but it’s almost impossible to be agitated or frustrated when you do that. When you’re smiling, you can’t also be annoyed. That’s a great technique.
The great thing about being present is it saves you time. If you’re only focusing on the person in front of you, the one thing you have to do in front of you and you stop telling stories, all of a sudden, you have a ton of time. It gives you instant peace. It gets rid of anxiety and depression. It makes your relationships better, your business better. You’re a better listener, as we spoke of. It gets your ego under control, which will always be hard for us.
Practical Steps To Presence: Noticing, Non-Resistance, And Morning Routines
How to do it? Start by noticing when you’re not. As we said, the second you start telling a story, and I always say, “Say something once, fine. Say the same thing twice, you’re now creating a story.” Stay out of victim mode. When you’re focusing outside the circle, you’re not going to be present. You can acknowledge, “I can’t believe this is happening in politics. It makes me sad. It really bums me out,” but then let it go or go start a funding campaign or whatever you’re going to do to make it better. Don’t just complain about it because then, again, you’re not accepting the moment. You’re not in the moment, you’re somewhere else.
Catching yourself whenever you’re saying when and referring to the future or past. The morning routine has been an amazing way for me to stay present. I love it because in this day and age, just put your phone on airplane mode and you’ll be twice as present because always having that distraction, wanting to check your mail, your notifications, turn notifications off, by the way. When I do that in the morning, it’s my most present, beautiful time because the phone’s off, I meditate, I do my plunge. I just stare out the window without thought.
You're not present when you're resisting anything. Share on XAlso, stop thinking. I think I did a whole episode on that. A thought is good. “I’m going to call this client. I’m going to start writing a journal.” Those are thoughts, and then you take action. Thinking is a terrible thing. I know for a lot of you, you’re going to be like, “What did he just say? Don’t think. We’re human beings. Thinking is what we do,” but when you’re thinking you’re unconscious, as Eckhart Tolle says, “You’re not conscious and you’re not present,” because when you’re thinking, again, it’s another version of storytelling. You’re just spinning out. The difference is I’m going to make this piece of art. You just start making the art, thinking, “If I do this art, I don’t know if people are going to like it. Is it the right colors? Should I really get a different color? I don’t know if I like this color.”
You just start on and on. That’s a very peaceful, easy version. The worst versions are you go on and on and in circles thinking about why somebody did what they did. You turn that into a story and now you’re really not present. Just have a thought, but don’t think. When you’re thinking you’re not in a flow state. When you have a thought and you’re taking action, you’re in a flow state.
You’re not present when you’re resisting anything. Non-resistance is another way to catch yourself. Anytime you’re identifying with form, with things, use things. Don’t let things use you. That’s my moment on presence. I hope that helps. Eckhart is a genius. If you haven’t read the book or listened to the audiobook, I highly recommend it. A New Earth was his second one, which is another version. I’m telling you, you can re-listen and reread this as I have for many years now and I still hear read something new. It still sinks in deeper in a different way. It’s really a book for life that is worth highlighting. Reading your highlights and rereading. Have a beautiful day. Be present. Enjoy life. Cheers.